How to help people.

People like us don't want to feel corrected, we want to be effective.
We want to look back and be able to say: "Hey, I did it, it worked, and it worked better than I thought."

Help people be more effective.

Here's how:

  • Leave space. Let people show you their work and don't judge.

  • Be curious. Identify where someone is trying to go with their work. Ask questions like, who is this for? what is this for? what change does this seek to make? why are you hoping those you seek to serve will care about that change?

  • Connect the dots. Help someone bridge the gap from where they are now to where they are trying to go.

But what if you're a leader and the work is all wrong?
What makes the work wrong? Did the employee create the work for a different audience than what was intended? If so, is that on you? How could you have created better alignment? Is the work of poor quality? What might be improved? Help the person cultivate a sense of good taste.

But what if the person is clearly unskilled?
Are they doing the right job? Did you hire for the skills you needed? It's possible that this isn't the right job for that employee. Perhaps this is a stretch project? If so, that's okay then. Come alongside that person and help them develop the right skills.

People like us want to believe we are doing our best work and that it makes a difference.

If you want to get really good at giving feedback, stop calling it feedback.
Instead, start calling it "optimization".

Does this help you become more effective?

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