Competitive Failure.

If you know me, you know that lawyers raised me, two of them. It's almost like the wolf pack raising Mowgli. My parents bred me to be a fighter. I don't like this quality about myself. Well, no, I like it in balance.  

In the past, I was working for an organization where I felt we were overpaying for service. Moreover, I felt as if the vendors knew we were overpaying for the service. Then, my boss challenged me to cut the cost by almost 100%. Remember how I mentioned that I am bred to fight? Yeah.   

I became obsessed with doing whatever was possible to win. For me, winning was eliminating the vendor: not even a reduction, a total annihilation. I wanted this vendor, and others like them, completely wiped from our balance sheet, never to return. There was just one problem; these types of vendors supplied talent to our company.  

I ended up going on an aggressive recruiting spree. I built as many relationships as possible with colleges, musicians, influencers in different cities and countries, drummed up referrals, whatever was necessary to increase direct recruitment. For the individuals hired through our outside vendors, I still booked them. I didn't eliminate our team. But I did focus on retaining our direct recruits first. At the end of the year, we reduced our usage by almost 98%. Remarkable. But at what cost?  

I failed to calculate the human cost. I became consumed with winning at all costs that the people I had to care for came second. They, indeed, became numbers on a spreadsheet. It was not until later that I realized my failure.

An employee I had hired came up to me and let me know that their recruitment moment was the singularly most important moment of their life. The individual shared that my job offer brought them out of a depressing situation. Wow. I had that impact on another human being?  

Suddenly, all of the wins and cost savings meant nothing to me. It didn't matter how much we saved. What money we didn't spend translates as lives impacted. What caused me to miss the importance of others? What happened that I did not help people find other work? How could I let myself become so consumed?   

Needless to say, after much soul-searching, I would learn to do this much differently.  

  • Communicate what's happening and what we're trying to do.

  • Ask the team for their input and advice. Make the employees part of the solution.

  • Develop better partnerships with vendors and have them unify around a common goal.

  • Be mindful, self-aware, and temper the feeling to "win" and use that energy to "help" others.

Winning isn't winning if it costs your morality.  
"Winning" is a stop along a more infinite journey.  

Now, I'll focus on the journey.  
Now, I'll focus on others. 

The Wrong Expectations.

Embrace Failure.