Brady Helps

In his letters, Seneca quoted Posidonius:

"In a single day there lies open to men of learning more than there ever does to the unenlightened in the longest of lifetimes.' In the meantime cling tooth and nail to the following rule: (do) not give in to adversity, never trust prosperity, and always take full note of fortune's habit of behaving just as she pleases, treating her as if she were actually going to do everything it is in her power to do. Whatever you have been expecting for some time comes as less of a shock."

My version which brings me more comfort: In a single day, there lies open to you, opportunities to learn more than can ever be learned by the person who believes they know it all. And, while you're learning, remember that time will pass as it does and things will happen as they happen — best not to be surprised by what life shows you.

My version for maximum comfort:

• Learn as much as you can because you don't know as much as you think.
• Life's a shit show, so stop crying and work at making it a little better.

"We need to talk."

If you ever heard or seen that message, you might have estimated that there are bad consequences to follow that talk. Perhaps you're getting fired, breaking up, a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal disease and has days to live, someone died, you have been diagnosed with a terminal disease and have hours to live, you're partner is pregnant, you aren't getting a bonus, you're losing the house, BTS finally retired, a war broke out, someone bombed someone else, the list goes on.

See how quickly yours and my thoughts can go from 0 to 1,000,000,000?

And, see how quickly you and I can decide that things really are 1,000,000,000?

Suppose you have the talk and you learn that something bad has happened — let's call it "level 50 bad". That you means you twenty million times overestimated the badness! Why and to what end? Probability need to calibrate our estimations of bad down a bit.

I know I'm picking on you. You're not alone though. I do this too. We all overestimate bad.

I am not saying that things can't be bad, or that things might not be really bad. I am saying, you and I are likely overestimating and deciding that it's worse than it is. I see that as arrogant.

Why should we be so confident to believe our overestimations? What do we know that the people living the slog don't know? And since we believe our estimations of bad, why are the people living it underrating their experience? Think about it. It's horribly arrogant on our part. I'm routinely told by my team that I overestimate how bad BTS is on our culture, and they're right, I should probably join them to see how bad it really is for them (Hat tip to Lizzo, a faithful reader).

And I believe you and I need to check ourselves. We need to remember that we overestimate and we need to calibrate down. I am advocating for being closer to what's actually happening than further away from it. It's easier to move through life when you see it as it is than how we intend it to be.

Easier said than done.

Apparently, pre-historic humans in Eastern Europe enjoyed fish, vegetables, and berries. And, if you read the article, you'll see that they weren't much different than we are now — some people like their fish with grasses, some liked them with tubers, some liked them in different ways. At the end of the day, they all enjoyed balanced diets.

Sometimes, history reveals that present isn't much different from the past. And, we're probably overcomplicating things.

Read more here: https://arstechnica.com/science/2026/03/recreating-the-complex-cuisine-of-prehistoric-europeans/

If you are over 30 years old, an overwhelming majority of your body's cellular mass has been replaced at least once, and in most tissues, many times over. Said another way, a majority of what you are now is not the same as what you were and won't be the same as what you will become.

When your body replaces cells and tissues, it's not like your body hits the reset button and gives you fresh new untarnished material back. It carries forward accumulated damage, adaptation, and errors. It remembers the damage and doesn't let you forget it.

Allow enough time to pass and the vast majority of what you were is not what you are now, and the vast majority of what a person was when they hurt you is not what they are now. And, that doesn't mean the body is any less scarred; which doesn't mean we can forgive and love any less.

I stayed with my dad the night before he died. In October, I blogged about the sounds I heard. I forgot to write about a companion that sat with me and my dad.

A fly landed, almost out of nowhere, on the lip of my father's mouth. It walked around, almost like it was inspecting my dad's body. I thought, "please, the guy's almost dead, let him have some dignity." The fly moved to my dad's chest and then to my leg and walked around.

I sat looking at the fly for I don't know how long. I watched it clean itself. I watched it move around. I thought what if my dad became the fly and now he's walking around looking at himself and at me.

A week or so later, my sister and brother drove my dad's cremated remains to Minnesota to bury. We kept a cup of his remains to let go in a creek at Beaver National Park, a park we visited as children with him. As we arrived at Beaver, a fly landed on the driver's side window. It stayed on the window as we drove into the park and to the parking spot, for a few minutes. Minutes later, the rest of dad was part of nature.

Twenty plus years ago, a psychiatrist told me I had bipolar disorder. They said I would never survive without medication. It's been just less than twenty years and I'm alive, no medication, and well managed.

One important method I use to manage my energy is to "conclude less" and "notice without judgment more."

Concluding is like deciding why, how, and what things are with little-to-no data to back up the conclusion.

Noticing without judgment is simply the act of observing and not concluding why a thing is the way it is. Noticing invites curiosity and acceptance.

The upside of this practice, I'm a lot more pleasant to engage with and I maintain a healthy and successful life.

The downside, I notice everything.

I went to pay for the food and noticed two signs.

"We don't accept cash, please use card."

I then noticed a jar with cash that read:

"Tips power us."

I see two different signals — "please don't give us cash" and "please give us cash".

I asked the person behind the cash register why don't accept cash for payment. The person said they prefer card because it's safer than handling cash.

— then why risk the tip jar?

I walked into the radiology center with my mom. A medical assistant named Kia walks up to us. Greets my mom. While looking at my mom, Kia says: "And who do we have with you?"

I decided I would make myself known by saying, "you can just ask me directly, I'm right here."

Kia took us to room 3280. My mom prepared for her tests. A nurse, red-head lady — I forgot her name, walked in and looked at my mom. Nurse introduced herself. Didn't look at me. Didn't acknowledge me.

Hello! I'm sitting in the room. It's okay for you to acknowledge me and say "hi!"

Doctor walks in. Introduces herself to my mom. Looks at my mom and says, "who do you have with you?"

I parked on the 5th floor of the parking structure. I walked to the elevator lobby attached to the parking structure and a sign read:

"Entrace to Main Hospital Floor 1. Ground Floor Exit Only."

I pressed the button for Floor 1.

I walked out of the elevator on Floor 1 and did not notice a main hospital entrance anywhere. I saw stairs that took me up to other elevator lobbies, and I found a door that went outside. I also saw a sign outside the elevator I just walked out of that read:

"Take These Elevators to Level 2 for Emergency and Main Hospital."

I took the elevator to Level 2.

On Level 2 I noticed an entrance to the hospital. I walked to the entrance. I saw a sign that read:

"Entrance for associates only. Go to Floor 1 for the main entrance and registration."

Happily, I pushed the button for entrance to Floor 2 entrance, lied to security claiming I was an associate, and calmy found registration --- on Floor 1.

I have the tendancy to become over obsessed and positive towards music or food I love at first experience. I recently discovered Bandcamp and quickly became all about it. I went so far as to claim it's the best platform for getting in touch and supporting independent artists.

I am a musician, but I am not an artist. I don't make original music that I then sell. I don't work with a ton of artists who do. I know quite a bit about marketing and advertising; but I don't know it well in the Indie music sense. What right have I to claim that Bandcamp is the best platform?

I argue none. My marketing knowledge, my experience as a musician, and my experience of the platform gave me a false sense of confidence before my claim. Someone with more indie music marketing experience might claim differently. Perhaps, on net, Apple Music or Spotify are better?

If someone were to call me out on my overclaim, I think I would acknowledge my lack of competence and commit to doing things differently. I would:

1. Acknowledge the initial reaction: "Oh my gosh, BandCamp is the BEST platform for independent musicians, I love it here." This is a reaction that feels aligned with my experience, I'm acknowledging my perception.
2. Baseline myself. I have no prior experience in music platforms for independent musicains to market themselves, but Bandcamp seems like a top-tier candidate.
3. Give some alternatives. Spotify or Apple Music might be stronger contenders. Also, Patreon or Substack-style membership could be better alternatives.
4. Define my probability based on a range tied to a definition. Let's say I define as "best for musicians to monetize their music directly to audiences", under that definition, perhaps Bandcamp has a 30-50% chance of being the best.
5. Specify what would make me change my mind. Maybe anecdotes from other musicians I respect, perhaps a report I read in a trade magazine, something else.
6. Decide how to act. Let's say I learn that most musicians think Bandcamp is "meh" and data shows its "meh", maybe I'l ldecide that I'll update my views to "Bandcamp is meh".

Reader, it's possible that you read this and say "David is just over excitable, got it." It's also possible that you stop and think about all the different ways you become excited/reactionary throughout the day. You won't have to think far to think of some examples. Perhaps, stopping and slowing down your process for deciding how things are might payoff in contentment and personal peace. You could always give it a try and update your beliefs once you learn more.